so don't talk, until you take a walk in my...

Herring bone Mt. Edition LX or Era LX (black/catchup).

SO when i started this monstrosity i said i was going to be following the vans market a lot closer. i've been doing a bad job.

and most of you have PROBABLY already seen these... or maybe you haven't.

These are hot. end of story.

because i myself have slowly been trying to turn my wardrobe into something une petite peu plus feminine...

i probably wont hunt these down. BUT IF YOU'RE A BOY YOU SHOULD.

they also come in plain black and white and royal blue and white...

xo

i am entirely predictable

Gemini - August 29, 2008
A goal that you may have been working toward for a long time might still seem very distant right now, dear Gemini. Therefore, today you could actually find yourself giving up on it. This doesn't, however, imply that what you want will never happen. In fact, sometimes letting go of a dream can actually cause it to manifest. Remember this when you start to brood on your lack of success so far.
All is not hopeless!

if you say so MSN horoscopes. if you say so.

i did all that i could anyway, so i can be ok with walking away for now.

cath you later alligator. see you on the other side.

got my dress for the film festival yesterday. kind of excited about this party. eventhough im totally behind the scenes, just because i had/will have such a big part in making it happen.

ME.

shy, introverted, little me. (or not so little me... i've gained like 10 pounds. ugh)

anyway,

lol.

xo

oh me.

can't sleep, clowns'll eat me.

can't sleep, cat will eat my feet.
....i don't want to talk about it.

yesterday i had serious Vik hangouts. the Dufferin mall is so culture.... but he got his Fukudome shirt and i didn't find anything to wear to my TIFF party on wednesday. We ventured all the way to Yorkdale, which i haven't been to in forever, to shop for about 40 minutes. good times.
On our way to pick up Bee from work some homeless man called me a dyke for not giving him a cigarette. i was pissed for about 2 seconds and then it was just funny.

i'm so tired right now i can't even think straight.
I found two belmont reguars in my pack of belmont extra lights today. now, whats the big deal? the big deal is i've already smoked a bunch of them. and it makes me wonder if there were more, and if this is some weird tobacco conspiracy to make me more addicted to cigarettes. (eventhough i'm not addicted to cigarettes.... but from an average persons perspective this might be irritating.)
and it's not like i've never smoked the regulars, i just find it sneaky.
i hate sneaks.

so there's this married couple that take the bus to st clair together every morning..(well, he goes to st clair and she goes to dufferin station). they're a little nerdy and a lot indie rock and both fairly young, but they actually make my heart melt everytime i see them. Everytime she looks at him it makes me feel like they're on a first date, because she always seems to be totally swooning. it's precious.
i'm actually the biggest hopeless romantic at heart. and seeing people like those two give me hope that maybe i wont be alone for all eternity.

Anyway, tomorrow should be interesting. (terror, DBD, warriors....)
I'd rather just hang out with you but long weekends mean you have no life. (thanks for the phone call though)
i want to go away right now.
i'd appreciate if you took your snark remarks elsewhere.
and you should stop wasting your time on people who don't deserve it.

xo

Snap back to reality

sometimes it's nice to think that you can help everyone.

and sometimes it's nicer to realize that people have to help themselves.

it's been fun being not me for three weeks. Drinking excessively and talking to/hanging out with people i would never had my life not come to some weird screeching halt. but now that I've got it all out of my system, it's time to get things back on track.

I have been seriously considering leaving Toronto lately. (dun dun dunnnnn...) just for a year or so to go live somewhere I've never been before. how many times have i said this. i know. but i feel like i need to start knowing places outside of Toronto. or even Ontario for that matter. (and anywhere in Quebec doesn't count...)

There's not a lot for me here other than my job and my friends. not that either of those things aren't worth enough to make me stay, I'm just getting restless.

i hate going home and having everyone in my neighbourhood stare at me because I'm a female and i don't have a Portuguese mustache or micro braids.

i hate comming into work and hearing my boss screaming at the people at Bell Canada for the third time in one week.

i hate meeting the same people over and over again who aren't worth my energy and definitely aren't worth my time.

SO i suppose i feel it may be time to take action.

i am currently planning two trips... one to New York City and one to California. if i have to go by myself i will, but i need to stop sitting around so much all the time talking about where i want to go and just fucking go already.

i wish i had more IRL stuff to update you on but i haven't really done anything since friday night. i don't even know if i told anyone what i did on friday night but i probably shouldn't talk about it yet.

i would like to have all of my tattoos done in Copenhagen by this guy.

i'm still looking for someone who does really good traditonal style work in toronto. any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. even...outside of toronto. hook me up.

also, if anyone has any suggestions of some cool places i should visit in the states, i am taking those as well.

Paris stole my best friend. (but i love that shirt...and i guess technically she is in england right now)

but i made a new friend. it seems like even when i don't want them, they always want me.

xo

P.S.

i love you.

xo

really?

seriously?
i didn't realize that you could do so much better.
(i am an awful human being.)

xo

Movin' up

so we moved our entire office upstairs yesterday.
computers. desks. fax machine. everythinnng.
i didn't realize i knew so much about computer set up. we were done in like half an hour and i saved us about 300$. (end bragging.)
HOWEVER, this is quite possibly the end of me lurking the internet for hours on end at work seeing as my boss now sits directly behind me. thumbs down.

hung out with (insert name here) yesterday. i haven't seen him in such a long time and quite honestly not a lot has changed. and thats not a bad thing. sometimes i like people to stay constant... it's nice to know you can rely on things staying the same sometimes.
telling you all who i'm talking about would bring more drama to my life and his than either of us should have to deal with in an entire lifetime. some people just seriously lack in maturity.

i don't know whats up this week. i don't have a lot of money until next paycheque and i don't know if i feel like hitting DLYF this week. My mom is probably comming down on the weekend, which rules because she hasn't even seen my new house yet and it'll be the first time i've seen her where i don't have to hide any of my tattoos. bonus. BUT, i will probably go shopping with B saturday if my mom comes sunday. so atleast i have one thing to look forward to.

so, everyday i take the TTC atleast twice to get to and from work. which involves a bus, the subway and another bus. I have lived in the city for almost 2 years now and it blows my FUCKING mind how many people who get onto the ttc, do not know how to get off of it. I'm not sure, if everyone is just mildly retarded, or if there really is a disgusting amount of illiterate people walking around... but when there are large font signs stating the proper way to exit a bus or a streetcar, or there are big yellow poles with the word PUSH in giant black letters on them, i don't understand how atleast once a day i see someone yell to the front about how they can't get out the back doors.
i think the TTC and the people who take it are one of my biggest pet peeves on the planet.
along with people who leave miniscule amounts of liquid in milk cartons/juice cartons/pop bottles and leave them in the fridge. I HATE YOU ALL.

So, with that being said... i should probably find something to fill my afternoon with seeing as the boss lady should be back from lunch soon.

just because you've never done it doesn't mean it can't be done...
if you know who sang that i'll be your friend for life.

xo

obnoxious

this weekend was interesting.
to say the least.

in the span of two days and one night i have done the following:
-gotten to know someone a little better
-gone for brunch
-gotten a cat
-watched entirely too many movies
-written a suprisingly long short story from start to finish
-given up on someone
-listened to only immortal technique (revolutionary, Vol. 1... because it is significantly better that Vol. 2, with the exception of "obnoxious" and "freedom of speech")
-taken a lot more photos of stupid stuff around my house
-fucked up my neck from sleeping on the couch because spencer is a drunken asshole (love you spence)
-bought my first (and last) issue of cosmo
-put fake nails on
-took fake nails off (and ripped my real nails off in the process)
-heard from katie! yay.

this weekend was actually a much more condensed version of everything i've felt in the past month rolled into two days. some of you might know what that means and most of you probably wont but thats ok.

overall i'm pretty hopeful about things to come in the next few months. Maybe a bike, maybe a dog, definitely not a loft in liberty village but one can dream.

if anyone knows of artists who do really good traditional style tattoos please let me know. or link me to some of their work... i need to get some serious work done soon.

xo

PHOTOZ!

yeah i know right.

I high jacked my work computer to upload all my garbage photos.

my top 5 songs about break ups:
(in no particular order)

Sincerely Yours - Hit the Lights
Ballad for the Lost Romantics - New Found Glory
I Swear - The Loved Ones

I Like the Nightlife Baby - The Suicide File

The Middle - Jimmy Eat World

blah blah blah. Last night was less than what i expected. not that it wasn't fun but there weren't a lot of party people there and jen bailed. bad jen.

But i love vik and sarah. and it was nice to finally see dani after like.. 6 days
oh and JOSE showed up. little broooooo! pics to follow.
SO as i told everyone... i dyed my hair. Katie moved and my shower caved in all in the same day, so i did it at her new place in parkdale (represent).

it's a really nice place. if i had of stayed at my old house we would have practically been neighbours. i need to get this little guy back from her so i can paint him...

look at those cute little legs! just be in my room already.

apparently this is what i do while i dye my hair alone in the bffles bathroom. who knows? i'm just getting used to taking my camera out places again, and have put serious thought into learning all my manual settings. im a huge nerd. you get the idea.

THIS WAS THE AFTERMATH:

i got so much shampoo in my eye it was dumb. totally dumb. but now i feel good about my hair again. which may not matter to any of you, but definitely matters to moi.

I don't really have anything else to say. today has been weird. i realize i say really dumb things to people i don't want thinking i'm dumb. it's hotter than hell. and i all i want is a dog and a bike and a loft or condo in liberty village.

CHYEA!

vik loves iphone.

I love shoes

katie has wicked stuff. jealz.

this is my shower. :(

This is why you shouldn't put plastic in the microwave. (duh)

This is why i love asian grammar.

Parkdale at it's finest

i pretty much just want to look like a doll. all the time.

and you, who probably wont ever bother reading this... please stop pretending like i don't exist. I've come to terms with the fact that i wont get to see you before you take off, so good luck with everything, and PLEASE be careful. and if you ever need ANYTHING, you know where/how to find me. i miss you.

xo

You mad?

viks mad.

hahaha don't get me started on reasoning. but i'll make it up to him at DLYF.

and then i will kindly ask him to remove the BLACK CLOUD OF DOOM he has put over my master life plan.

"Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work" - Aristotle

So i'm doing the TIFF kickoff party at the Deluxe post production studios on Adelaide east. 3 bars (two full, one martini), a cappuccino bar and a couple of passed hors d'oeuvres.

little food & lots of alch. = 250+ drunk people.

My boss has been letting me head a lot more projects lately which rules to the fullest. And actually, even though yesterday was only snacks, and my driver forgot my linens and bottled water and other small necessities... Cervelo Cycles was such a wicked little place. And everyone was way too nice and laid back. It made covering for all the missed stuff a lot less stressful.

However, in saying that i've now revised a quote 5 times for this guy in Denver that's having his annual partners meeting at the Toronto Stock Exchange in September.

Now, i don't know how much any of you know about catering or event planning but let me just tell you that revising quotes is a huge pain in the ass, especially more than once.

Enough about work.

Yesterday i went to the Ex with Michelle and Steve. Hanging out with Michelle again ruled. i won her a Knuckles. Then she won, and traded up for a much more furry, less crooked eyed tiger. Got some pretty cute stuff that i will debut later. Jen Gillen will be pleased ( i live to please jen G... especially when she sends me pictures of weird hand drawn "Wu-tang for life" posters at absurd hours of the day). Hopefully she went weasel missioning.

i know i keep referring to "weaseling", and none of you probably have any idea of what i'm talking about... except maybe angry Vik. but don't worry lovelies. you're not really missing anything.

So next weekend is the terror, warriors, DBD show. is anyone going to this? is EVERYONE going to this? i know i'm going to end up there, but some events in the past week or so have made me think twice about it definitely. I don't think i can pass up seeing Frankie. haha
I miss his brotherly headlocks and and using me as an unwilling sparring partner.
The past month has just been such a roller coaster for me, i don't know if i can put myself in the position i know i'm going to be in going there.

WHO KNOWS.

anyway, i've been at work for an hour and a half and have accomplished nothing.

Disney Couture please

xo

ohhh nooo

jen and i.
workin that weasel.

so what if i'm a little bit of a terrible human being, thats why most of you love me.
and i more like to consider myself as being determined.


i have a tasting this morning at enwave then i'm heading over to Cervelo Cycles to set up my stupid event. Fruit, and pastries, and coffee are so boring.


i need to start planning million dollar parties. and thats all there is to it.


Made an appointment to finish the beast yesterday. Matt Ellis is such a solid guy you should all really check out his work.


I ALSO, dyed my hair brown again yesterday... pictures to follow. soon. seriously.

in the meantime.... someone PLEASE buy me this BB Dakota dress:

DLYF tomorrow night. come out. i wont be crazy.
vik probably will.


xo

tiger style

i have been listening to entirely too much wu-tang.
if that's even possible.

so, Vik got rock band! we spent a good... 3 and a half hours last night unlocking songs and venues. i played bass because it it significantly easier and can actually play on hard. ( i know right, how impressive am i)
There's really only two down falls that i can currently see...
1) you play these secret sets that usually consist of 3 songs that you don't know before hand. Vik and i ended up playing "Say it aint so" by Weezer, "Creep" by radio head, and this GARBAGE bon jovi song about being a cowboy like 5 or 6 times each. (don't get me wrong, i love jon, but there's only so many times i can hear "wanted dead or alive" before i just want him dead.)
and number 2) the drums are obnoxious. soooo distracting. i don't know if they come with those drum sticks or if Vik was just feeling showy, but it's a little much. i don't know if it's any better to be playing them, i wasn't really feeling up to that challenge... but i'll update on that once i've tried em' out.

anyway, in other news... found this sick vintage mens lacoste dress shirt yesterday for 6$. And i know what you're thinking, vintage/second hand stores remind me of weird rockabilly chicks, too, but sometimes you just have to roll with it. (and yes, i realize some rockabilly chicks are cute, but it's pretty rare.)

anyway, i have a client in denver waiting for a proposal.
make money money
make money money
make.

xo

here it is.

my IRL blog.
i grew up in a town of upper class, predominantly white dutch christians. and although a lot of my day to day comments may seem to state otherwise, i have nothing against being in the money, OR white people, especially if they happen to be dutch.

i moved to oshawa when i was 19 to go to school. (what a bust).

and then i moved to toronto. and here i am, still not really knowing what to do with my life, making mons and trying to fill the gaps of non-work time with things and people that seem worthwhile.



If you're interested, follow along. i'm going to try and update as much as possible with photos of my day to days, and stories of the same.
i'm also going to be following the vans market and other companies/things i'm interested in a lot more closely.

so if ANY of those things interest you, get readin'.



THIS, is one of Obey's new little treasures (80$) that i hope to find somewhere in the near future:

















there's a totally adorb matching wallet that you can get too for an extra 40$.
...i currently have a slightly disgusting obsession with matte studs. sue me.


anyway, i'm in the works of getting my home computer back up and running with an internet connection so i will upload some IRL photo's soon. swear.


in the meantime, it's monday.
and i have IRL work to do.




xo