growing pains.

so recently, i said something pretty shitty to someone who didn't really deserve it.
Bad timing i guess.

"it's funny how you can grow your hair out and start wearing dresses and suddenly everyone can see what a great person you are."

Maybe i shouldn't be complaining. but for whatever reason it just doesn't sit right with me when someone couldn't give me the time of day a year ago and suddenly they can't live without me. or need to know me. or need to be around me.

and i don't just mean one person, i mean multiple persons. And maybe a year, or two years, or three years ago i would have killed for that much attention from those kinds of people, but now? not a fucking chance.

none of it really matters anyway as it doesn't really apply to anyone that reads this.
I'm not going to say much else.
But i know what i want.
And it's not any of you.

xo

"Fuck It I need beeeerrrrrr"

cue vik running off into the night.

SO this weekend was actually so decent thanks to the random events of saturday night.
Friday night was a bit of a write off. Took the TTC along king out to broadview and then back to dufferin along dundas hating life. went home, angry slept and then woke up to vik texts about gyming.
Went to vik's, played some rock band 2, went to the gym, came back to do vik's homo fantasy hockey pool, got pizza and then went to meet up with Queen Bee at Dundas square. Thats when the night started to get random. but in a really good way.
Hung out at Patrick's for a little while and watched the monstrosity that is "So You Think You Can Dance" canada. waited around for a little while before giving up on scott and going to Dee's.
I drank a lot of water.
Everyone got foods and we just hung out waiting to see if anyone was going to join us there.
"and what does that say?"
"sink, swim"
"and what's the relevance of that?"
i love humans!
after dee's we said goodbye to bee and started a trek to queen and ossington to meet up with the ever elusive scott. we got to about... dundas and ossington at 1:55 and vik decided he wasn't going to miss out on last call and went tearing off down the sidewalk to get beer. I've never seen vik run so fast in my life.
As it turned out scott was at neither Sweaty Betties or Baby Huey's, and we temporarily lost vik but found this guy, which was almost as good.
Once we located Vik we wandered all the way down to parkdale to hit up the Rhino, which i haven't been to since i moved out of parkdale (R.I.P 1365), to finally find scott, who happened to be accompanied by a very drunk jamie, a very drunk laxton, a birthday bergin, and a seemingly angry jesse. Plus some other people i don't really know.
anyway, the time spent at Rhino wasn't anywhere close to how long it took us to get there, and before long Vik's umbrella was broken and i was waiting alone for the Dufferin bus to take me back to my house.

Anyway, i woke up sunday with a fucked up back from sleeping weird and spent the rest of the day starting to clean my house and then bailing to go hang out and play more Rock band.
we unlocked motorhead.
and linkin' park.
need i say more?

ANYWAY, strip club friday night.
it's on, and if you're cool you'll come out.
just sayin'.

xo

like screaming at a wall

I STILL DON'T GET IT.

it just doesn't make sennnnnnnnse.
AGHsgahgdsodsiuyaggggggsdagjogfdsagfdsajlgfds

losing patience

you know it's never been my best trait.

I'm buying all of this after next friday.

realistically... by all of it i mean the dress and the crewneck...because thats all i'll actually wear. But i wouldn't completely rule out that plaid MOB shirt either.

A boy i know should invest in the Rebel 8 x True S/F new era hat.

i don't care which boy. just A boy.

i'm having a rough week.

think i might pass on DLYF tonight... but thanks for all the pre-drink party offers.

xo

sometimes things happen

that make breathing really hard and you instantly want to puke.
and maybe you're over reacting, but either way it's still not a good sign.

achtung

It really pisses me off when people just act like you don't exist.
and i don't mean strangers.... that i could care less about. I mean people that you were legitimately friends (or other) with at some point in time that pretty much just cut you out of their life for no real reason other than they found something better to occupy their time with.

or someone.

it's no wonder i don't bother trying to be friends with anyone anymore. keeping up a relationship with someone shouldn't be tiring...
and when did being a total dick become cool again?

xo

are you ready?

are you with me or not.

so... pictures. of my weekend.

i'm not going to explain everything...but we drove up to dani's parents house friday night and her mom fed us so much delicious food. saturday ruled. FYS rules. IHOP rules. Evan Pierri rules. Grand rapids.. is kinda weak, but our hotel had a liquor store in the parking lot. ruled.

uhhhhh there's some other random stuff in there. like PK (pumpkin), some DLYF, back to school lap dances, some other wierd stuff.

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

LIKE ON VACAY?!

ROAD TRIPPPPP!

legally blonde anyone?


peace out canadizzle.
NFG NFG NFG!

xo

Public Enemy #1

there are a lot of things i don't want to talk about.


Lately i've been putting my trust in the TTC to take me places far away from my home after work. Monday night i ended up in the beaches, which is definitely not nearly as cool at 9:30 at night. I don't know what it is about taking the queen streetcar places but sometimes when i have a lot on my mind and nothing to do that's what i turn to.
the good old 501.
Usually east bound.
because who the fuck likes etobicoke anyway.
I'm alone in the office for the first time in what seems like forever. Not that that has anything to do with me not writing as much lately.. i guess i just haven't had a lot to talk about.

I'm really excited to go away this weekend. All i can think about is the times Katie, Dani and I would drive to montreal, even if montreal is actually the one place i wish i never had to think about, and it makes me really excited to have rediculous sing a longs and play dumb car games with my two favourite people in the entire universe.


The rest of this entry is going to be devoted to what males should never own, or wear, if they are interested in getting laid by anyone who isn't a hippie or who's last name doesn't end in "ia" or "io"....or i suppose just "i".


BIRKENSTOCKS.
it's bad enough that they're now "in style" for those weird hipster meets abercrombie type broads... but on men? never.


TEVA sandals. ESPECIALLY with socks.
most frequently seen on old Asian/European men.
and unless you are either of those things... lets keep it that way.


Hiking Boots
There is no reason, anyone who lives in the city of toronto needs to own a pair of these.
i know a lot of you want to DRESS like lumber jacks... but unless you get out of toronto every weekend to explore the great outdoors.... or something... better just leave these alone.


Bell Bottoms.
John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever....
Need i say more?


ANYTHING made by parasuco.
OKAY. so i live near Corso Italia. and yeah i might have a little bit of a bias because dudes who wear this crap always seem to have something lame to say about my tattoos and it's annoying. But parasuco is like the leader in mens clothing for still using a bedazzler.
so i guess, if you want to be known as the guy who pays too much money to a shitty designer to bedazzle his clothing, then fine.
anyone who can take on that title is a man regardless.


i feel another night alone is needed.
maybe i'll go somewhere and write.
i guess if worse comes to worse i could always watch Dracula for the 3rd night in a row.
Winona Ryder is so hot in that movie.


xo

domdomdom.

Subject: No Subject
Body: whats cooking young deer ?
give me a shout
see you later animalls

REEEEEEEdiculous. so french.
I miss Dom.

LAST NIGHT (she saaaaid...) i got my back finished. Finally. and almost passed out, which has never happened to me before but i think i was really worked up from running late that i got weird.
but i got one of these out of the whole ordeal so it worked out in the end. Matt is like, this really awesome (heavy handed) Uncle that i never had. or Dad even. i opted for uncle because he already has an adorbs little bundle of his own.
ANYWAY, he's way the hell out at north york centre... but he'll take care of you. so get work done by him.
and I will have pictures soon.
BUT, yesterday i also realized that i get paid THREE TIMES in October. (siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick)
so i'm getting my side piece started on the 18th. 2 and a half hours. i MIGHT die, but it'll be worth it.
yeah yeah yeah. i'm a big baby.

thats all i really have to update any of you on.


xo

nothing important.

current things i'm lurking.

i'm muchos sickos.

this weekend was a weird blur and i don't really feel like getting into details of what i did.

this week is going to be much of the same.

-sales downtown

-shitty office work

-bffles return

-tattoo tomorrow

-dlyf thursday (maybe)

-unrequited text messages

-waking up at 5am to pumpkin

-jen g in mtl (gay)

-running out of money

-not having a bike or a dog

-being sick

i want nate to come back.

i can't wait for the 19th weekend.

and it seems like everyday i'm giving up on/regaining hope with so many aspects of my life it's actually impossible to keep track.

stay out of trouble kids.

xo