so walk it out.

all i've been doing lately is watching stomp the yard.

my grandad can no longer drink fluids. he probably isn't going to make it through this weekend.
my moms best friends dad died last night. cancer. it was diagnosed about 2 weeks after my grandads was.
he was her second father.

i'm still laughing.

xo

Just call me debbie downer

yesterday was by far one of the worst days of my life to date.

FOR STARTERS, this wasn't meant to be the end all and be all of our friendship. we just don't work in a living environment together because we are too different now. you have your priorities, i have mine, you have your views on things, i have mine, etc etc.
This didn't need to turn into some childish "meet me on the playground at 3" type shit.
just saying.

My mom came down yesterday to go see Repo with me. Yeah i was in it. Yeah i saw myself. I was really irritated and she was obviously over tired and we kind of bickered a lot. She told me that the last time i saw my grandad was probably the last time i was going to get to talk to him. he doesn't really wake anymore for longer than 3 minutes. and maybe twice a day.
he didn't even get to see my tattoo.

I have to move in february, i don't really know how i'm going to afford that yet since i wasn't planning on leaving until march really at the earliest. I don't think i want to live with anyone but at the same time i can't really afford not to. the whole situation is really fucked up and i'm sure what i'm going to do.

i also, in a span of about 5 minutes last night managed to light one of my gloves completely on fire and break the zipper on my wallet, which allowed me to lose my last 40$ until friday.

after the already mentioned occurences of this week... i don't really know how much worse things could get right now. hahaha
and all i can do is fucking laugh.
about everything.

xo

OH really now. come on.

"Ollie, Paul Samplonius, and Sarah Bolen are now working with me at Good Time Design by appointment only. Check out GoodTimeDesign.com for booking info."

OF COUUURSE you actually moved here and got a job working at a shop i get tattooed at. WHY WOULDN'T my life work out in the shittiest way possible and throw you back into my life at the worst time ever.
atleast when you lived in another province i didn't have to worry about possibly bumping into you and having my foolish little heart ripped out all over again at the sight of you.
hahaaaaaaaaaaa stokedstokedstokedstokedstoked.

xo

LOL

Soooo for the past three mornings i've been comming into work to GIANT like.. 15 MB e-mails from my mom who i guess has come into the 20th century and discovered lolcats.
If it was anyone else, these e-mails would be recieved with a groan and some sort of comment like "yeaaaah it's spelled wrong i get itttt". but because it's my mom it's pretty much the most adorable thing ever.

"these are so CUTE!"
"got these ones too, aren't they funny?"
"Found more! lol have a great day!"

my mom is the most awesome being on the planet. and yes she lol's.

Too bad i hate mexican food more than anything in the entire world.
Except for maybe the current lack of MASH UPS in my life. (jen gillen i'm looking at you.....)

xo

oh heyyy blog friends.
it's been a while. the office has been a bit uptight and hectic lately so it's been harder for me to write. Plus, seeing as my life seems to be the largest pile of shit lately i didn't want this to turn into bummerspot.

two things i am looking forward to:
getting tattooed on sunday. KINDA. i'm liking getting tattooed less and less because i think my pain tolerance is going away forever... but this ones important. My grandad probably isn't going to make it to Christmas. so atleast he'll get to see this before he goes.
and fitness with jen on Saturday. FITNESS! the act of getting and being fit. melon pants. melon ass. mash ups. omg.

Winter has always sucked for me. no matter whats going on it's just never a good time. This year it just seems like there's a lot more shitty garbage adding to how crappy my winter is going to be. Crappy living situations, crappy friends, crappy grandad situation.

If you're going to talk to people about me behind my back i am not going to be friends with you.
end of story. i am above all of this petty bullshit that no one i used to be friends with seems to have outgrown.
i am not going to get involved, and you and i are no longer cool.
thats all there is to it.

i am trying to make my room as much it's own space as humanly possible. if anyone wants to come to ikea with me next weekend to shop for some stuff... i'd appreciate the company.

i'm starting to just not care anymore, about a lot of things... which honestly should probably concern me. but it doesn't.
which ironically, is concerning in itself.

SHOES! i can't be bothered to explain all of them but most of them are artist releases (like musicians), a pair of "thrashin" sb highs, the MOB hi edition that i wish didn't have patent leather, and those patent fucking studded supra's that i want just for those times i like to dress up and pretend i'm gene simmons.

kicking and screaming

UNTIL I GET THIS.

so. cute.

P.S. you're so cool, you're so cool, you're so cool.
and if you weren't drunk when you watched it.... maybe you'd get the reference.

xo

o_O

could you be any more vague and unconcerned with the problem that is happening with my computer?
seriously.

"i can't go out *coughcough* i'm sick"

"boo! you whore"


yea. exacttttttly.

xo

I am on an episode of Maury Povich

with more psycho broads and less maternity tests.
lets cut the bullshit here, shall we?
i have been SUPER cool about all this weird i like boys, no wait, i like girls garbage for a really long time now. and you know what, i would still be cool about it if you weren't all so fucking insane about it.
AND, it's the same group it's always been.... with the exception of one who has decided to play for one team, and one team only, and is significantly more sane now that she has a stable realtionship with one person that isn't any of you.
I don't care, if you're a girl who likes girls, or a girl who likes boys, or a girl who likes both, but being deceptive is still being deceptive and lying is still lying regardless of your sexual orientation.
it isn't ok to be in a relationship with someone and lie to them about the someone else you're secretly interested in.
it isn't ok to pretend to be someone's friend because you see them getting closer to the person that you're secretly interested in when you're already in a relationship with someone else.

does this make sense to anyone other than me, or am i completely fucking crazy.
this is not a world i would like to be a part of, so please stop bringing this shit into my life.
thank you.
end rant.

xo

read this.

http://jengillen.blogspot.com/2008/11/no-news-is-good-news.html

because jen gillen is quite possibly an alien being who has been sent here to make people pee their pants with laughter.

just sayin'.

xo

he'll be suprised when i walk up and say

Man, I wanna make you glad you're alive


karen kamon i love you.



i got these yesterday:

On vinyl.

ANNNNND















on cassette. r00lz.


xo

where have all the good people gone

fuck your falsehoods.


thank you to the one person who apparently cares about my well being these days.


VANS update -
spent way too much time alone in the office yesterday. I'm super into the Chukka low's right now... anyone who shares my unfortunate chubby ankle situation should be too.
all of these rule:

(for all of you that don't know, neck face is a graffitti artist from california. he's the art director for Baker Skateboards and does work with a lot of different companies providing artwork for all sorts of products.)

chukka lows. super simple, super nice.

if i didn't have fat ankles i would totally rock these. the feathers are so cute. (and all of you know my thing for feathers)

and these are for Vik...

xo

nobody laughs anymore

for once in my life, i can actually say i do NOT deserve this.
There isn't even a reason that i could pass off as why i could possibly deserve this.

i haven't been this dissapointed in a really long time.

xo