life is easy?

550$ and a one way ticket to montreal.

"I dunno what it means either. it just means it's gonna be ok. I'll get a job no problem and party with a million skinheads until my brain explodes"

I'm going to take a shot in the dark and say maybe this is one of the many reasons why we never worked.
i do however, wish that i could find it in me to live like you sometimes.
throwing caution to the wind is definitely not my forte.

good luck

xo

The Beautiful People

so im going through a weird marilyn manson thing right now. nbd.

this weekend ruled.
spending an actual friday night with adam was so nice. if it wasn't for him my "social life" as i know it would be even more non-existent.
Seeing fys on saturday was pretty much the best thing i didn't wuss out on. it's nice being so excited to see people and have them be equally as excited to see you too.
It's nice having insight on situations you were unsure about too. nice in a really relieving sort of way.

I'm bummed i didn't get to see rob on saturday. but i did spend all night yesterday with Nate and that ruled because i think i miss him more than most people who come in and out of my life. I hope he moves back because i would like to be able to hang out with him on a regular basis again... we used to do such fun stuff together.

My mission for now is to get through this week and buy sunglasses on friday. I want a pair of frogskin oakley's and funnily enough i saw a pair in a window on queen last night so i guess i'll go and see how much they are and if they have any other than those ugly pink ones....(so ugly.)
and then it will be off to Elvis Fest! which is weird! but it's going to be so funny and i'm dying to see Tom in costume. it's the only thing i've heard him get overly excited about while describing... ever. so it has to be good.

i would like to go to montreal before the usmmer is over and see Seb, and JF, and Dom.
i would also like to go back to new york city if i can but i don't know when i'll have time. i have to discuss my 2nd week of vacation with my boss soon (which i will NOT be spending at home alone this time thank goodness) which is like.. a little over a month and a half from now so i guess i better start saving some money... hahaha

anyway... i doubt anyone really cares about this update... as is the case with many of my updates, but thats ok.

xo

oakville hardcore

wait...what?

My bk cup next to your bk cup.

in the van.

going places.

story of our lives, right?

love you.

xo

ladybug

ryan kearney is sitting on the couch across from me talking like a 5 year old about the hockey hall of fame.... i love him. and i'm super impressed with his friend randal. coolest dude ive met in a long time.
i'm so glad he asked to stay at my house. makes me miss the time i got to spend on the road with him and the guys. makes me wish i didn't have a real job so i could take time off to see people i want to see more...and just generally have more freedom.

i want to win the lottery so i dont have to work anymore and i can just go back to school and freelance.

so my dresser can look like this:

and my bed can look like this:

and my desk at work would look like this:

and i could make people and pictures look like this:

then i would buy ice cream cones like this:

duh.

xo.

sakuters

for the win.

http://thatsbone.blogspot.com/2009/04/product-feature-villains-co_28.html


xo.

i dont know why

but this made me smile so huge when i saw it. and it may or may not have anything to do with the unknown reason that when i saw it the only person i could picture doing that is gillie.

i have already been awake for two hours and made chocolate chip pancakes, finished two loads of laundry and watched one of the many feel good movies of the early 2000's (she's all that).
i'm also almost 100% positive i want to go back to school to become a makeup artist.

i'm going to the grocery store.

i feel amazing.

xo

you spin me right round baby right round

"if i wanna bounce my booty to some reggaetron sean paul yellin out temperature, i'm gonna do it faded into amerie with the faint beat of pip paine pulsating through both pairs of my lips."

Shits about to get so good/real/hectic.
Y'ALL DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU'RE IN STORE FOR.

xo

life is grand

life at the grand?
yeah. it rules. i got mashed with mash-ups on saturday night. It was proof that you can make anything awesome if you drink enough booze. hahaha actually one of the most solid nights i've had in a long time. also might have been more drunk than when i got kicked out of the Casbah, which i didn't think was possible.

this is what the worlds cutest hangover looks like. mostly because i passed out in such a way as to not ruin my look from the night before. har har.

anyway. more shits i can't afford....

xo

wall 2 wall 2 wall 2 wall 2 wall

nyuk nyuk nyuk nyuk.

xo

Hey you

Glad to have you back.
xo

WIN

3/3.

remember when i said "i really want things to work out"?
Well, they did. in every circumstance i was referring to.

can't wait to see vik and "friendzone" tomorrow.
mostly so i can figure out where the name "friendzone" came from.

xo

Real talk. For real.

A real life post. not just "this is all the stuff i want but cannot afford" post.
after everything that went on last week i needed to get a little bit of partyrage out of my system.. .which i guess is where thursday and friday came from. Thursday being the lesser of two evils was spent at strangelove as mentioned previously.
Friday i went to Hamilton for Nikita's birthday with the intention of drowning out the previous nights hangover with way too much more alcohol.
I still hate Hamilton, but overall, it was worth it.
Jager + Jagerredbull + Vodkalime + Vodkalime + Budweiser + Jager + Vodkalime + Vodkashowers = me getting kicked out of the casbah at 2:15am.
eating half a pita.
yelling at adam for changing the tv channels and making me feel sick. (sorry pal)
waking up like this.

and going for golden griddle all you can eat breakfast buffets.
Favourite BBM line(s) of the night :

Julia Claire: Fucj that
Julia Claire: Oloaztg moore
SHP: Sooo wasted
Julia Claire: Spoo wasted

that about sums it up.
Saturday night was spent mostly playing Xbox. and ordering way too much sushi which was the best idea we've had in a long time.

I feel like my entire life is in limbo right now. I dont know where anything is going and it's a good and a bad thing. it's giving me time to consider the things i want to change about my life but it's making me feel really uncertain about where i'm headed.
My relationships with Katie, Jen, Vik, Jose... and actually even Ben and Alex are some of the most important things i have right now.
I still need a Vacation. like A.S.A.P. but i feel like as we get past february... or even just this week things will start to sort themselves out.
I really want things to work out. in every sense that could possibly be taken as it applies to so many current situations in my life.
And i really want a raise so i can start to purchase all this shit i've been posting. and maybe paint my blue room of doom.

xo

hey dj pump this party

i wish the whole world loved 90's dance tunes as much as i do.
i actually had a really decent time last night. the music sucked. and most of the people sucked.
But actually hanging out with jose was awesome.
and having polasian (dont ask) phil over was also awesome.
and i'm glad i finally got to see alex for once on one of her trips home from ottawa.

i might be more than a little bit stoked on these...








I might have worn them to work this morning even though there was very minimal sun. and Annie might be one of the most solid, honest, giving, and fucking wicked people i have ever met. Big ups to Jen Gillen for being a great judge of character. i can't wait until she comes down again.



I am super into pictures of pictures lately. and revamping. you know... revamping? no more red hair. no more overgrown bangs. no more blue room. no more living on a couch. no more bad friends. no more heartaches.
and lots of party.
(and bullshit....)

J.G.P.S.
Baby Zipper might be growing on me...maybe.

xo

sick as a dog.

i was.
but im actually feeling better except that my blackberry seems to be screwing up already after only having it for like 2 weeks.
I haven't written in a while. i feel like i don't have a lot to say that i haven't already said a million times before.
i need a vacation.
my boss is crazy.
i love/hate toronto.
etc etc.

Taking jen to Mtl next weekend with me courtesy of my bossypants. thanks for the free hotel/plane tickets you batshit crazy piece of woman you. I'm supposed to be going to some huge event planning trade show/work shop things but whether or not i'll actually make it is another story to any/either of those.

You have quickly proven to be more than i ever thought possible, especially once i thought things started to go down the tubes, and i don't even deserve you. it sucks so much for me to see you so unhappy when the answer is so simple. or atleast seemingly simple to me... maybe i just don't understand having never worked 7 days a week in my life, but i can only imagine what that would do to me. physically and emotionally draining. thats all i can think over and over in my head and i wish there was some way i could get you out of this. thats not something i want anyone i care about to have to try and cope with on a day to day basis. And not being able to make you feel better kills me everyday...i can read you better than you think i can. and probably better than you hope i can too.

All i want to do lately is watch true romance because it reminds me of you.
I really fucking miss Dom. anyone who calls me "baby penguin" on the regular is someone i need to have in my life more. haha
I also miss Michelle, which reminds me that i need to read her blog when i'm done writing this...
and katie gale is the light of my life with her bk big fish and her baby face being late for workies due to bk big fishes and google image searches. big fish bk google big image fish searches.

AND it makes me glow on the inside comming home to two spaghetti cats, A.A.H, and Men Chillen erry dayz.

Life is good. lets get big.
xo


P.S. i plan on writing the longest "THESE ARE THE ITEMS I CURRENTLY WANT TO OWN" entry when i get home. beware.

stars.

most of the time i believe astrology is bullshit. but sometimes it throws generic shit like this at me and it just so happens to pertain to my life so vividly that it's hard to ignore.

Try not to get weighed down by your own emotions today, dear Gemini, but make sure you give them the opportunity to have their time in the spotlight. You may find that there is a strong force working to cover up the truth of what you really feel. Make sure you express yourself openly and honestly. At the same time, you don't want to be so over-dramatic that you blow things out of proportion and add more melodrama to the situation.

I ran into my old best friend yesterday with his current girlfriend who is basically the reason we aren't friends anymore. that was awkward. the conversation ended with him telling me to "get out". (of grimsby). and i think it was meant to be funny but at the same time maybe not.

I lost a really huge job at work today. one i've been working on for like... 3 months. and the woman wasn't overly nice about it considering the time i put into revising her stupid proposal 800 times with the we have no money, we have money, we have no money again bullshit, and the fact that i went on a site visit last monday. not impressed.

all i wanna do i LVL.
and maybe hibernate for like 2 months.
i am like the human definition for caring too much...too fast...too often.
whatever.
you get the idea.

xo

Big ups post!

so... after spending for too much time alone in the office today i've decided to make a post to all the things i love, or hate that consequently result in something i love.

big ups to the Via rail and the TTC for making my boss just late enough this morning that i wasn't caught being late.
big ups to my boss for being the craziest woman i have ever met so that any boss i have in the future will be a walk in the park in comparison.
big ups to red hair dye for making me feel good about hacking all of my retarded hair off again.
big ups to matt ellis for always being able to decipher what the HELL i'm talking about.
big ups to jen gillen for being the best robot legged friend anyone could ever ask for.
big ups to katie gale for not throwing away her old winter jacket and helping me fashion it into a new one.
big ups to arthurs fresh company for making those amazing mango plus smoothies that i super enjoy.
big ups to feta cheese for being a perfect addition to any meal i happen to scroung together from the nothingness within my fridge.
big ups to that guy who threw his shoes at george bush for throwing his shoes at george bush.
big ups to who ever came into the office last night to clean all the sparkles off my desk. alllriiiight.
big ups to anyone with a digital SLR camera for making photography the new "it" trend so that people will take their attention away from "hair dressing", neon, and cocaine.
big ups to the city of montreal for inadvertently showing me what the worst time of my life should feel like.
big ups to the city of niagara falls for showing me the opposite. (believe it or not...)
big ups to my mom for being the best mom anyone could ever ask for.
big ups to my brother for that day i showed up at his office swearing infront of everyone about the juice all over my purse.
big ups to the sweet potato for it's insanely low prices on amazing organic foods.
big ups to the asian woman in the variety store across the street for giving me a deal on cigarettes.
big ups to labbat 50.
big ups to my ever growing unreaaaal record collection that brings me more joy than most humans.
big ups to my idiot landlord for breaking so much shit in our lease that i can get off for not giving her enough notice about us moving out.
and last but not least...
big ups to me for getting through all the garbage that just got thrown at me and feeling like a million bucks.
go me.

xo

dead weight.

"I dipped a cat toy in chicken bouillon and lionel is being the cutest ever!".

someone needs to fix jens leg. soon.

SO i got a noogie from my 60 year old boss on friday.
a noogie.
i almost got fired. for, i'm not really sure what... apparently i just walked in at the worst possible time after sleeping in. but i called. and she was fine so that wasn't the reason.
And then at lunch i got a paycheque, and a noogie, and an "it'll get better."
rediculous.

I have been staying up until ungodly hours of the night/morning with Jen playing this completely awesome Indiana Jones Lego game. i think Annie sending her an X-box was one othe best/worst things to ever happen to our lives. life. hahahaha
My cell phone is still broken. and i don't have money to get a new one yet. Just incase any of you have tried to get a hold of me and couldn't. or thought i was ignoring you.

I'm covered in sparkles from doing all these stupid christmas cards. my desk is covered. my phone is covered. my face is covered.
worst.
I don't hate christmas, but i hate most things christmas related.
Anyway, i feel like this month, and this comming year could be a huge huge turning point in my life. i don't want to jinx anything, but i feel like i'm about to get so good. or maybe life is about to get so good and i'm going to stay shitty....
jaykayjaykay.

+'s
getting my own place
decorating my own place
laptop for christmas...maybe
furniture shopping
tattoos saturday
melly friday

-'s
mizzin' u


xo

well i've got a confession...

ha ha ha ha.

So last night i went out with an old friend to the reservoir lounge.

we actually sat at that exact table and drank wine and listened to this jazz band all night. it was different for me. but good different. with good conversation as always, that comes more naturally than sleep.

i was... fairly intoxicated when i got the text from jenjen on my way home saying she was dans l'hopital. huuuuuuuuuuge bummer. i sad.

i've been working like a dog lately. and my boss is growing increasingly more insane as the days go on. Comming to work every morning is like being a hostage stuck inside a building waiting for a bomb to go off. actually.
no i am not exaggerating.
I spent a solid 4 hours yesterday in the office in silence hearing only the repeated slamming of her wireless mouse.
is it worth it? i don't know. probably not. but until i move, i'm staying i guess.

i'm getting tattooed twice in the next week and a half. i think? i haven't heard from dan since the middle of november so... lets say atleast once.
this isn't interesting.
you aren't at all who i thought you were
you either.
or you actually.
Dissapointed? not really.
Suprised? not in the least.

xo

all hope abandon, ye who enter here

SO woah. yeah. whats up Crisis week.
My grandad passed on friday, i'm sure you all heard. That was the hardest death i've ever had to accept. and thats all i want to say about that right now.
On Friday afternoon i left work to go be with my mom before we even knew any of this was going down and managed to dump an entire bottle of Vitamin water out in my purse all over my phone and ipod.
the ipod Survived. my phone... only kind of survived.

Yesterday i worked the Royal Bank Christmas Party and it actually ruled. I hate serving more than anything on the face of the planet, strictly because i'm totally done with jobs where people don't even see you as being human.
Anyway, i worked as a bar back which meant the only people i had to interact with were my own staff and that made the night awesome.
it still sucked being in a room of 600 suits... but i made a lot of money so i'm over it.
I'm doing the CIBC christmas party next week too, which should be atleast another 7 hours. moneymoneymoneymoneyiceymoneymoney.

does anyone even.... read this anymore? hahaha
i need more boots. and i wish i could wear heels sometimes.
this makes no sense because im on the phone with jen.

c u!
xo

LOL

Soooo for the past three mornings i've been comming into work to GIANT like.. 15 MB e-mails from my mom who i guess has come into the 20th century and discovered lolcats.
If it was anyone else, these e-mails would be recieved with a groan and some sort of comment like "yeaaaah it's spelled wrong i get itttt". but because it's my mom it's pretty much the most adorable thing ever.

"these are so CUTE!"
"got these ones too, aren't they funny?"
"Found more! lol have a great day!"

my mom is the most awesome being on the planet. and yes she lol's.

Too bad i hate mexican food more than anything in the entire world.
Except for maybe the current lack of MASH UPS in my life. (jen gillen i'm looking at you.....)

xo